Roger Karr Jr.’s first wheels were a Chevy El Camino. In fact, he’s driven nothing but Chevys ever since.
So it seemed only fitting that he named his first-born son after his favorite brand of car, with the name of his favorite NASCAR driver — Dale Earnhardt Jr. — thrown in for good measure.
Chevy Dale Karr arrived at Brandon Regional Hospital on June 13.
Jumping Jehoshaphat on a pogo stick. Are you kidding me? Chevy Karr? This is why there should be someone on the payroll of every maternity ward who can veto names: "No, I'm sorry. You can't call another human being that." The over/under on years spent in prison for Chevy is ten. Place your bets.
By the way, if he commits patricide... no jury would convict.
15 comments:
When we had our firstborn, in South Carolina, the nurse told us that she'd had patients name their children Placenta (pronounced "Pla-sen-tae") and Meconium. (You'll want to look that last one up... or not.)
Also, one of the kids at the camp I used to run was named "Girlannette".
When I was interning at the DA's in Waco, the prosecutor I was working with told me about two brothers who always seem to be on the wrong side of the law: O'Rangejello (Oh-RON-jeh-lo) and L'Monjello (Leh-MON-jeh-lo.
Bambi Deere. Rusty Staples. Diamond Guitar. Real people from my hometown.
Girlannette is the best thing I've heard in awhile, though. Wow.
Fancy Dan, Thunder Bill, and Dusty Rhodes were two brothers and a sister that I went to high school with. I'll give you three guesses to guess the guys...and it's not Dusty. Btw...the parents named their kids after horses. Who does that to their kids?
We once fostered a child named "Passion." You should have seen the looks people gave us when they heard her name, not knowing we didn't name her, nor could we tell them we didn't name her.
I think the L'Monjello thing is an urban myth. I ran into that same story several times. But it's still funny. And it's terrifying that it is believable.
My idea to name my firstborn Ignatius Xavier doesn't seem so bad, eh? I'm gonna call him Iggy X.
You know . . . when I worked for Subway in the Richland Mall, I could have sworn there was an Orangejello my Waco High coworkers always talked about. I had no idea how to spell it, so it didn't seem all that weird at the time.
But my favorite is from Catch-22: Major Major Major, military rank: Major. If his mother had been awake when his father named him, he would have been Cee Sharp Major.
Proof that I've got an active streak of white trash in my family:
I have family members named Aunt Bill, Mama June, and Uncle Red.
Many of my illegitimate children bear the names of former Baylor greats, but nothing beats the actual real-life BU law review guy named Baylor Worthum. I think he's graduated now. He apparently went to Baylor undergrad and Texas Ass & Mule Law School - would his parents have let him go anywhere else? Doubtful.
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My sister-in-law worked for TWC and she met people with all sorts of interesting names, her favorite was Syphilis.
But one of my personal favorites was a guy named Dick Funk who was mayor of San Angelo.
You're a sports man Baker. These names aren't nearly as bad as say, Dick Trickle or Chubby Cox. Maybe as bad as Dick Butkus or Johnny Dickshot but maybe not.
One day, maybe this kid will play football it will be like the times I turned on the t.v. to watch FSU and De'Cody Fagg only to hear the announcers yelling, "Fagg slips free of another tackle." "Fagg goes deep for the second time tonight and Weatherford hits him again."
No. Maybe it won't be like that with Chevy Karr. Maybe it won't be like that at all.
Last one, promise...
Albert Pujols.
I realize I may be behind in my blog reading, and thus commenting - but - my best friends mom is a teacher in a district that is highly immigrant population and from all ethnicities. She had twins in her 4th grade class - Male & Female - pron. Ma-lay and Fi-Ma-lay. The kids every year explain that their mom when having them after having just arrived in the country thought the USA named your kids for you - "Baby Female and Baby Male" and there you have it. Urban legandy yes, reality yes, as I saw the class roster to prove it.
Greatest sports name ever:
Hakaan Loob.
My personal favorite ever is Fomika Dinette.
Pujols. Hehehe.
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