Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Last Acts of Law School

Packing up my life and moving to Dallas continues. Just a few more days until I go to the Big Moving Van in the Sky, and kiss off from the BLS. I cleaned out my locker today and took some really ugly clothes to Goodwill. All in all, a productive day. But before I go, I get to do my three last BLS acts.

ONE. Barrister one more time with Jerry. Jerry is just about the smartest person on the planet, and one of the nicest ones, too. We get to sit down a grill first years on con Law issues they don't understand, which will be great fun. It's one last chance to do something law school related with Jerry who I am proud to call a great friend. His friendship of me means one of two things: it means I'm am a pretty good guy to have someone so smart and decent who is willing to call me a friend OR it means Jerry is a terrible judge of character. We're leaning towards the latter.

TWO. Go to immunity day. Why the heck not? I'm not getting called on tomorrow. And hopefully we'll wander over to Scruffy's for one last hurrah at Scruffy's. Rumor has it, there is karaoke. I wouldn't know.

THREE. Get interviewed for a BLS promo video. Someone in the recruitment office had a sudden lapse of judgment and thought it would be a good idea to have someone talk to me and then get someone else to record it. and then possibly use part of the footage to convince people to come to Baylor. Really, who listens to me? I promised Becky I'd even shave, as I've been living out my unemployed hobo fantasies this week and I'm beginning to look like I live under a bridge.

Then it's Dallas, ho.

Monday, March 24, 2008

Brackets and Tree

Osler insinuated that I may be the Western Kentucky Hilltopper. Nothing could be further from the truth. I am moonlighting as the Stanford Tree. Unfortunately, I will start my job as a brand new baby attorney on Monday, so I must give up the duties of Tree-ness. Though the Tree is coming to Texas, so Longhorns beware. There is nothing scarier than a dancing tree.

Unlike Osler, my bracket looks great. I know, no one cares. Talking about your bracket is one step away from talking about your fantasy baseball team. There ought to be a law preventing public discussion of either. But, since that law does not exist yet, I will brag about still having all my Elite Eight teams left, plus I nailed both Siena and Villanova. Too bad that my Butler pick went down in flames. Stupid refs.

Too Much TV

I've watched a truly unhealthy amount of basketball this weekend. By Sunday afternoon, I thought I was gonna need those Clockwork Orange things on my eyeballs just to make it through UNC-Arkansas. I'm a trooper.

Friday, March 21, 2008


Hide the children! Beware of the Western Kentucky Hilltoppers! Big Red is coming to celebrate! The best part of the toruney isn't last second shots or gambling on your bracket. It is goofy mascots. And by any measure, Western Kentucky has one of the goofiest mascots in the country.

Thursday, March 20, 2008

Big D

Driving to Dallas in a monsoon was not fun, and there were actually times I thought I was going to die. Such is the way of the world. I didn't die, and I got to meet the new boss and find a new place to live. I am two weeks away from becoming a Dallas resident. Pretty cool.

However, today is my favorite day of the year. I will sit in a bar with tons of TV's and watch 16 basketball games, most of which involving teams I barely care about. Really, how awesome is the tourney? I will of course be passionately rooting for every double-digit seed, but especially UMBC (Go Retrievers!) and the B (Go Bears!).

Monday, March 17, 2008

Bears Dance

The Selection Committee made the B wait. And wait. And wait. But after they had their fun tormenting Baylor, revealing the Bears last (that's 65th of 65), the NCAA threw the Bears a bone by giving them a pretty darn good draw. Have you ever watched Big Ten basketball? It's like watching paint dry. Well, if the paint was getting fouled by some awkward post player. Purdue ain't that great, particularly for a sixth seed. Let's put it like this, Baylor will be the far more athletic team.

I'd rather have Baylor's draw than Texas A&M's. And A&M got a higher seed. But at least Baylor will have a puncher's chance in the second round against Xavier. If A&M gets past BYU in the first, they are going to get stomped by UCLA. So, all things considered, maybe it was a good thing A&M beat Baylor last week.

Sunday, March 16, 2008

Spring Break

I am not dead. Despite what the people who left me 10 messages on my cellphone think. I was just in Houston without my cell or internet, enjoying life as a soon-to-be-employed attorney. Being in Houston reminded me why I'm happy to have a job in Dallas.

I also learned that it hurts when Random Drunk Guy punches you in the head.

Monday, March 10, 2008

Environmntalists Say You Are A Sinner

Before your gas up your SUV, beware that you are going to hell. Now, there's nothing the Catholics enjoy more than listing sins which are going to damn me to eternal torment, I know this from a lifetime of mass. So, using styrafoam and failing to throw out my fast food leftovers is yet another we add to the things I will not do. I mean, like I need another mark on my ledger.

Not to be outdone, the Baptists joined the failing to go green is a sin party. Because as long as people are getting sent to hell, the Baptists are so there and will not be outdone by anyone.

OK, everyone. Give a hoot, don't pollute.... or you are going to hell.

Friday, March 07, 2008

Black Shroud of Dorkiness

Dorks and geeks everywhere... today is a day of mourning. For today, Gary Gygax, High Lord of All Things Geeky, has died. As the creator of the oft-mocked and oft-imitated Dungeons and Dragons, he had a surprisingly large impact on our culture. Role playing games have reached a certain level of acceptance, and are among the most popular computer games (World of Warcraft). Hey, I freely admit to hanging out in a basement and rolling a 20-sided die. Mock if you will (and I'm sure you will), D&D was pretty fun.

In tribute, here's a link of Stephen Lynch singing an ode to the classic game:

Thursday, March 06, 2008

Back to BLS

Not having a job has turned out to be surprisingly busy. Job interviews suck up a lot of my time, but the MPRE looms this weekend and I did manage to squeeze in a trip to the Baylor-Texas A&M riot, er, basketball game.

I also made my triumphant return to the BLS courtrooms, to help Matt judge mini direct and cross. As a rule, everyone was pretty good but still raw. And it's pretty cool to get to sit in there and see everyone's potential and realize that in a few months, they will probably reach it because, well, they won't have any choice. Say what you will about PC, it does make you accomplish things you didn't think you could. It's not a whole lot of fun, but getting to step back and see how much progress we have all made in just two quarters is pretty fun.

And no one got a memo. Making the courtroom 50% less evil.

Tuesday, March 04, 2008

Awful Injuries

Talk about burying the lede. In the ninth paragraph of a story on Soriano's broken finger, the Cubs official website unleashes this bewildering passage:

The Cubs have had a variety of injuries this spring. So far, infielder Mark DeRosa was hospitalized with an irregular heartbeat, pitcher Jose Ascanio had a bruised face after getting punched in a robbery attempt, and outfielder Felix Pie missed a couple of days early because of a twisted testicle.

This begs a few questions. One, how did Pie twist said testicle? Two, why isn't this a story in and of itself? You didn't think people would notice this sentence? Third, why does he insist that the pronounciation is "PEE-yay" instead of, well, "pie". Because I almost had a new favorite player.

Monday, March 03, 2008

The Real World Beckons

I never knew doing nothing could be so rewarding. Free time is the greatest gift the world could give me post-Bar, and I am gleefully wasting time. I wandered around the HEB for two hours just because, well, I had nowhere else to be.

Eventually I have to get one of those job things I've heard so much about. Actually, I had an interview this morning and I made the rounds trying to drum up leads. So now that I've spent a glorious weekend doing absolutely nothing, it's now time to join the real world. If you happen to be an employer, feel free to hire me.