Intramural signups are up and I am without a team, seeing as most of my class is not here for the summer. So I am declaring myself a law league free agent. Besides, I need an excuse to wear my soccer socks.
Not only will I provide your team with athletic ability and beer*, I also give you the off chance of witnessing a spectacular injury. I'll even drive myself to the hospital in the aftermath.
NOTE FROM MANAGEMENT: By beer, of course I mean Gatorade. We would never drink alcohol at a school-sponsored event. that would be wrong. And beer causes cramping.
didn't you tear your knee up during softball? what an animal!
ReplyDeleteWould you be willing to have the spectacular injury just out in front of the law school, unconnected to some silly sport?
ReplyDeleteHow will you be able to drive when you have two stumps for legs? Didn't Osler report you already have one? Oh yeah, I will take this opportunity to declare myself eligible for the law league draft. I hope I don't fall into free agency...I want to be able to hold out for the most money.*
ReplyDelete*Or beer.
Prosthetics. And I will kick your ass in wheelchair basketball.
ReplyDeleteAnd I'm sorry, all injuries must be sports-related. Or when playing croquet. And yes, I have a torn ACL right now. Can't tear it again, can I?